so i was thinking yet again about the differences between porn and
erotica and how annoying i find both of those words.
erotica is the stuff by and for women, right? character-driven, textual,
sensitive, literary, etc etc examinations of relationships and emotions.
and porn is the horrible nasty stuff that men create and buy to actually
have orgasms.
it reminds me of a conversation that i had with a coworker a million
years ago. we were both demonstrating our tolerance; she was asking
patronizing "i've never met a lesbian before" questions and
i was not ripping her throat out. i don't remember how exactly she determined
that i had never had sex with a man. but as soon as she did,
"you're still a virgin!" she told me.
well. it made me grouchy then, and it still does truth to tell. sex
requires a penis? lesbians can't have sex? the only real sex is for
a male to insert a penis into a female's vagina until he orgasms? ah,
yes. the sex ed=reproduction ed that i got in elementary school in the
70s.
but god knows enough lesbians buy into it as well, in a slight variation.
that sexual activity between women is pure, abstract, emotional, intellectual,
whole-body focused. versus those nasty objectifying men with their shallow
emphasis on orgasms, of course.
well i realize that it might be strange given my sexual preferences
and tendency towards stone, but i find that damn annoying.
doesn't the whole porn vs. erotic debate simply recreate that whole
association of female sexuality with relationships and male sexuality
with orgasms yet again?
what-ever.